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 Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon

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saru shonen

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PostSubject: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Fri Jun 28, 2013 4:42 pm

Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshu (swift lion crashing star)
Adding one for Kidos/tools

Tool/Kido name: Jinsoku raion hikō hoshi not a zan a extra weapon

Creator: mayuri kurotsuchi

Background: mayuri kurotsuchi was told by genryusai yamamoto to make a tool that any young soul reaper could use so their would be less casualties in the soul society and he made a weapon of mass destruction the Jinsoku raion hikō hoshi but they had to be recalled do to misuse of this item now saru shonen owns them because he found a old broken down old version and improved on it then produced atleast 100 more

Description: (Of the item in question and how it works.)
Spoiler:
 
ability When thrown it absorbs all the reatsu around it until it hits it's target. Nobody controls it it controls itself it is able to be avoided but it has it's own speed rank it moves by itself so you keep dodging it. When it hits it releases all the reatsu it collected in a huge explosion. You know how powerful it is once the colors glow each color glows when 1 level has been reached. If it fills up to the last bar which is nearly impposible it is unavoidable. The more glowing bars the faster and stronger it becomes. if it fills completely it can chop through anything even a zanpakuto it takes spiritual energy that = all the spirit energy in a captain's body to fill it up completely. If you try to hit it it absorbs the blow so it is best to dodge any reishi it collects while moving will be absorbed. Even taking the first hit is not smart if it hits something else it does not explode it just chops through it and keeps going. affraid

Strengths: it can be used easily to defend yourself against more powerful enemies

Weaknesses: if u take the first hit it is a whole lot weaker but still deals damage to anyone
scale:purple can absorbs about 5 percent of the spirit energy a captain has green absorbs another 15 percent yellow absorbs about 20 percent and the rest absorb 10 percent of the energy a captain has and the speed is  different purple goes at the speed of a basic shunpo specialist green goes to a lieutenant after that it goes the same speed till it turns blue then that goes to captain after that the rest is until the last 1 is sui feng in shunp the last 1 is yourouichi in shunpo x 10 each level does damage and the first 3 do damage that would injure a lieutenant not gravely after that it does damage that would severly injure a lietenant the 5th 1 6th 1 and 7th will kill a lieutenant/injured a captain and the last 1 will murdur a captain/injure a vizard


scale:



absorb purple 10% of a captain's energy green another 15%
yellow another 20% red 5% blue 4% pink 15% violet 1% orange is 40%

speed purple my speed green 1.5x yellow 2x red 2.5x blue 3x pink 3.5x violet 4x orange 4.5x

damage
purple does damage that can barely injure anything green can injure a 3rd seat yellow can injure a lieutenant/kill a 3rd seat
red and blue can severely injure a lieutenant pink and violete can injure a captain/kill a lieutenant
and orange can kill known fighter


the rate it absorbs reatsu is purple fills up automatically green and yellow combined take like 1 minute at a time red takes 2 minutes or 1 post blue takes 2 posts pink takes 2 posts too and violet/orange both take 3 posts


Last edited by bankai8299 on Sat Jun 29, 2013 5:11 am; edited 8 times in total
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Angron

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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Fri Jun 28, 2013 7:59 pm

I straight up don't understand this, so everytime you dodge it it becomes more powerful and upon the last of 5 misses it becomes undodgable... Yet Your suggestion is to dodge it... Wouldn't taking the first hit be the smarter thing? And how can it know when it has hit its target if something else gets in the way? How is it controlled? DOes operator control the tool? How was it made? Who made it? Where did they find this technology? Who came up with this rather odd idea?
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saru shonen

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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Fri Jun 28, 2013 8:05 pm

ok well pretty much lemme edit it
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Angron

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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Fri Jun 28, 2013 8:26 pm

There's just not enough detail on it or its origins, to make me want to give clearance to the power you've given it.


I think you answered only one of the questions from my first post.
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Mokuntaku



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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Fri Jun 28, 2013 11:48 pm

Ok, I need a few things from you.  First, I want you to grammar edit this, as I feel as if I have picked up on a fairly low amount of this information, at least effectively.  Second, I want you to change Reishi to Reiatsu, or something of that sort, seeing as how if it absorbs all Reishi around it, it would basically do what Uryuu did when he took off that glove;  everything within Soul Society and Hueco Mundo that is within range of this weapon will basically decintegrate, and the explosion will be so great it can take out miles of radius.

Finally: Can you make some sort of scale of how much Reishi/Reiatsu each level can hold, and how much damage it does, as well as how fast the weapon moves?

EDIT: Can you provide an English translation to your techniques and items and such from now on? It is just a bit easier.
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Mokuntaku



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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Sat Jun 29, 2013 12:24 am

Grammar is a bit better. You still do not have the scale. Make it something this:

First Color, [INSERT COLOR NAME HERE] fills by taking in [INSER AMOUNT OF REIATSU HERE]. It moves at [INSERT SPEED HERE], and deals [INSERT AMOUNT OF DAMAGE HERE].

Then you keep going until all the colors are covered. Also, I do not see any drawbacks to this. Even what you posted as a weakness does not really seem like a weakness. Also, you need to put in the rate at which it absorbs Reiatsu, such as, it takes [INSERT AMOUNT OF TIME HERE] to absorb [INSERT AMOUNT OF REIATSU HERE].
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Mokuntaku



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PostSubject: Re: Suu~ifutoraion wa hoshi o kurasshunot a zan a extra weapon   Sat Jun 29, 2013 5:09 am

Change the kill anything to kill most fighters known. Because, for all we know, godly people gonna come out like, BISH DIS MAH HOUSE!! Think you can hit me with a bomb!! I will flick you and you die!!

Otherwise, approved.
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